The Update

So I made you mad and said something that shook your world. I am truly sorry. There are alot of things on my mind right now and my entire future is one of them. Unfortunately, you are the only friend I have so if I mess things up with you, then I will be completely alone. That is my incentive.

Stress can be pretty difficult to deal with at times. You just want to throw it in the corner and avoid it but either way, you are going to have to solve the problems sooner or later so why not do it sooner?

There is a little baby girl sleeping in front of me. She means everything to me. Unfortunately I have missed a good portion of her life already and I'm making an attempt to at least get back in her life. I love her with my heart and soul... she is my princess. But I feel like there is still a huge burden on my back even though I have cleaned up my entire life. The one friend I do have is one that hates me and doesn't trust me. The only people I really have to encourage me right now are my parents and they have done more than enough already for me.

I just wish I could have my best friend back. I'm lonely, I'm sick of not having anyone to share my emotions with, I'm tired of feeling sorry for myself every day, I'm done being so depressed that I don't even want to get out of bed, and I cannot stand to see my life fall apart again. It cannot happen. Sorry I am such a downer... just had to let off some steam.

-quixotic-